Resident Physician at HMH JFK JRI Rehab

I am a physician, but that is not all of who I am. I think that it's sometimes easy to lose yourself in a profession. Especially after all of the years it took to get this far with our training. Not only am I a care taker, but I am also a daughter, aunt, niece and best friend. Constantly seeing sick patients within the hospital really puts things into perspective. It makes you want to take better care of yourself so that you will be able to provide for your loved ones. Recently I have gotten back into working out and also identify as an athlete and yogi. I am hoping to expand my identity with the next chapter in my life which includes becoming an attending.

When I was a young girl, I wanted to become a physician because unfortunately I had a complex medical condition. During that time I was very confused, and no one in my family had any knowledge about medicine. I wanted to become a physician not only to better inform myself of medical conditions, but to also ensure that my family has the best care. I want to be able to take care of them if they ever need any medical advice in the future. Knowledge is also power, and I like to be mentally stimulated and challenged. I like how medicine is always evolving and the learning continues even years out from training.

I think during medical school there were a lot of trials and tribulations, probably similar to other people. I always doubted myself though. Even when I knew something I would question it, which made me quite fragile. Everyone says that in medicine you need to have “tough skin,” but I really hate that saying. In particular, I had to write HPIs for a particular class, and unfortunately my proctor was not very warm and fuzzy. She was significantly hard on me, and I would sometimes cry after class. I'm not sure if she was trying to make me stronger or what, but it definitely did not help my confidence. I overcame it by constantly working harder than my peers to prove her wrong. In addition, through the strength and guidance of my friends, I was able to persevere. When I was on my clinical rotations I took pride in establishing relationships with patients. When I was able to make a difference during my clinical years, I felt much more confident and happier being out of the classroom setting, applying what I learned. It helped that the attendings I worked with were very kind and easy to talk to when I had questions. They never made me feel insignificant when I was rounding, and I really felt part of a team.

Going into my specialty as a physiatrist, what attracted me most with this profession was getting patients back to their functional level. This in itself made me hopeful of patients' futures. PM&R definitely provides equity. We work with patients with a multitude of disabilities. We do our best to provide a better life for them after a trauma. We discuss care plans with families and provide support during a traumatic time within their lives. Overall, physiatrists truly try to ensure that their patients have maximal functioning in order to freely live their life as independently as possible.

I aspire to be the best physician that I can be. I am graduating in a few short weeks. The transition from resident to attending will definitely be a challenge, but I have already faced many challenges during this journey. I really just want to make a difference in patients' lives; whether that be helping with spasticity management so that their caretaker can dress them or ensuring a patient has a new prosthesis due to poor socket fit or failed locking mechanism. There is so much support within this field from colleagues as well, and I hope to network while learning from others.

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Be kind and patient to yourself. Know your strengths, and write it down. As silly as it seems you will need to remind yourself how amazing you are because there will be some bad days. Just remember your purpose and your "why." Try not to compare yourself to others. Everyone learns at their own pace. You are meant to be in medical school just as much as everyone else. You worked hard to be there. Do not ever doubt that. Lastly, make sure that you surround yourself by supportive and kind people. Make time for your friends and family. Continue your hobbies, even if it is not as frequent as prior. Work out! I cannot emphasize working out enough. It improves your mood so much which makes it much easier to stay focused and study.